Why Pay Attention to Me?, 6-28-2010

 Think of me as another Mr. Bad Example.

On July 1, 2010, I become officially a felon.

I have lost profession, family, and I have no money, property, or future beyond prison. As for ambition or desire for anything new, I am without any feeling for either. 

All I want tot do is clear off the balance sheets of my soul before death finally comes calling. About death: looking forward to it is all I have left myself.

All I can give are my ideas. All the good I can do for the remainder of my life, how I can clear off my balance sheets, is writing what is on, and in, my mind. What cheers me is I can say much without any concern for offending anyone. I think I have these words will pale in comparison to my criminal acts. Understand, I do not write with the intent of being offensive. I mean to be truthful without regard to offending paying clients. If my style is less than graceful, I apologize for that offense.

I had no intention of living to this age. 

As for writing: two friends convinced me that since I was still alive, I could do some good by writing what I went through and why. I added some other subjects. I think of it atoning for my sins.

Why am I outlining a book I will never be able to write? Because I sit in a halfway house, seeing its needs, and have no better use for my time. Let someone else take my ideas, take the profit.

I find a 12-year sentence probable. With my family's history of bad lungs, I have serious doubts of surviving my sentence. That glaucoma is also likely to invade my eyes, blindness may result even if I live past my sentence.

[With chagrin at having disappointed myself (maybe you, too), I refer you to Mr. Burns' mouse. sch 1/3/23.]

Things need done and cannot wait on for their doing. Keeping these things to myself constitute a selfishness that I do not want. My arrest shattered my pride and vanity. I lack any need for accolades.

The same feeling extends to other ideas I proffer here. Please do not dismiss them out of hand due to my fall from secular grace. Feel free to disagree with their merit or efficacy or their presentation. I do think many - particularly those concerning Anderson and education - deserve a trial.

I believe my ideas are sound, but that does not mean they can be implemented without modification for the facts on the ground. Furthermore, I really do not care if you take credit for them. I offer them only in the hope to do some good, not for credit. 

We stand looking into an abyss, and our lack of civil discourse threatens to push us into it.

Make of all this mess what you will. All I ask is that you do better than I did.

sch

[I still say steal any idea you find here, if it can be turned to some good. I will not claim it afterwards. sch 1/3/23.]