Burning Out?

I play catch up, again. I have been too tired to write my Supervised Life posts. Break the rules, pay the price. Here goes my report 

Monday

Monday came close to being a disaster. It was the 13th, after all.

All went well until I got to the bus station. No cigarettes. I had left them at the room. I cursed myself, decided to walk to the old Village Pantry on Jackson and be a half hour late to work. Back to the station, I lit a cigarette while waiting for my bus, then onto the 6:45 bus, and off at Cowan Road at 26th. I decided to have a smoke as I walked. No cigarettes. My temper flared. My stubbornness kicked in. I caught the bus as it came back up Cowan Road to the Hoosier Pete at Hoyt Road. I made my purchase and walked to work. I was an hour late. I was already sweaty. 

My bullheadedness is still there under the Zoloft and my efforts at patience. Got started on something and come hell or highwater I will finish it 

At lunch I tried calling the guy doing my polygraph. We got disconnected. When I called later, around 4:21, all I got was his voicemail.

Work, otherwise, was good. Walking and stacking boxes is all I recall.

I wanted to see Macbeth at the Minnetrista Center. After work, after failing to reach the polygrapher, with a big thunderstorm coming in, I stopped for dinner at The Barking Cow. I had their Barnyard Club.

 

This is what the sky looked like when I left the restaurant:

The play seemed unlikely. I did not fancy walking back from Minnetrista in the rain. 

Probably would have been too tired, anyway. Back in the room, I feel asleep for an hour while watching tv.

I wrote some posts for future publication. I have filled out June with posts. I checked my email.

 Another day, another rejection of "Colonel Tom":

Thank you for sending us your work. Though we appreciated the read, we're sorry to say we are unable to use this submission.

Warm regards,

The Editors

Juked

Tuesday:

Semi-truck trailers are hot. I began sweating by 7:15. My clothes were clinging to me all day. Let James White and the Contortions sum up my work day:

I left a little after 3 PM. I walked to Cowan to catch the 3:15 bus. I checked my texts. I thought maybe   My PO texted me that I needed to get the polygraph scheduled. After all this time he had become Action Man. I sent him a text back that I had been trying to get the job done since Friday.

I passed on The Merry Wives of Windsor at Minnetrista. I went grocery shopping. 

I tried calling my sister about her schedule. No answer. I sat outside Payless, eating ice cream and waiting on the bus when I called the polygraph guy. I should have talked to my sister first. I got the polygraph guy on the phone. He gave off the same attitude I keep getting from the professionals I keep meeting in this process. We got a date of August 2. I missed the bus talking to this guy. 

Two hours after leaving work, I got back to the room. I got a lecture when I told Melissa of the date. I had misread her schedule. I texted the guy while I talked to my sister. I told him the problem, asked for the next Tuesday. No response from him.

I showered. I fell asleep on the bed.  I woke choking on regurgitated ice cream. I made these whooping sounds as I tried to catch my breath. I coughed and whooped and coughed and whooped. I suspect I could be heard across Broadway. My lungs hurt. I got up. It was going on 9. 

I checked my email. More feedback on "Colonel Tom":

Thank you for your submission. It was an honor to receive it.

Though the piece, unfortunately, isn't a fit for SCAB, your talent is obvious, and I hope your work finds a better-fitting home somewhere else!

                     

Kind regards,

Dominik

Editor 

SCAB magazine.

 We appreciate the opportunity to consider your submission. Unfortunately, we're going to pass on it at this time. We enjoyed reading your work, and often have to decline some fine writing. We hope that you'll keep us in mind in the future.

Sincerely,

The Editors

LEON Literary Review

I went back to sleep.

Wednesday morning:

I got on time. I started updating this post 2 hours ago. I kept missing the bus. I am tired. I really do not want to go to work. I called in, said I was not feeling well, and would try to be in by lunchtime.

It is going to be hot, hotter than yesterday. I could easily go back to sleep.

I fear being burnt out. Looking for another. But that will complicate the routine I have now. I will not be able to miss half a day. As if I can afford it now. Again, I had to finish this regardless of the costs to me.

For anyone keeping score, my "Death and a Kiss" has 783 reads.

I need to stop. I will close out with Cole Porter:

 sch