Overlapping Fiction and Reality

The following came from an interview THE DANGEROUS MYTH OF THE “PERFECT VICTIM”: A CONVERSATION WITH JONATHAN PARKS-RAMAGE on The Rumpus site  with a gay author (thank you, LitHub newsletter), describing his his fiction and personal life overlap, and if that bothers you then why do want to write?

Rumpus: What was it like to filter those aspects of your personal life through fiction?

Parks-Ramage: There was a chapter of my life, during the wild and reckless years of my early twenties, when I was drawn to dating “daddies.” These men were significantly older and possessed a great deal of power, whether it was through fame, cultural influence, money, or some combination of the three. Meanwhile, I was an aspiring artist; I was broke, I was new to the city, and I felt lost. In all of these relationships, I was drawn to these older men because I felt that, in a way, I would be taken care of, that a primal need for protection would somehow be satisfied in their embrace. Also at play: the irresistible pull of wealth and privilege and vacation homes and presents. But the ultimate irony was that none of these “daddies” provided the paternal protection I expected from them; the opposite was true—the power imbalance left me uniquely vulnerable and in the toxic control of men twice my age. Instead of setting myself up to be protected, I had left myself vulnerable to exploitation.

During this time, I was also working in a gay restaurant where I was regularly sexually assaulted by the owner and the clientele. I was thrust into gay nightlife, which was very unhealthy for me. So, there are many areas of this book that overlap with my life. I also grew up with a minister for a father; the religious questions that are explored for the main character are also ones that I’ve explored personally. Again, this is not autobiographical. But there are definitely areas where fiction and reality overlap.